I tend to keep myself busy. Overly busy to be exact. I keep telling myself that a lengthy to-do list is normal. I’m an adult now and this is what adults do, right?!
My busy schedule was keeping every hour of my day packed with something to do. I definitely couldn’t miss my 5:30am date with the treadmill; it would be irresponsible of me to drop any of the emails, meetings and deadlines that were stacked high on my desk; and I couldn’t fathom cancelling dinner dates and gatherings with friends. Oh, and sleep! I couldn’t forget to sleep.
As I ran from one appointment to the next, I was oblivious to the fact that I was beginning to spread myself way too thin, pouring myself out but failing to pour anything back in. I was depleting rapidly, on empty, running on whatever fumes were left. I could feel I was stretched thin but I brushed it off and told myself that this was my new norm.
I’m an adult now, remember?
One thing this schedule was very good at was keeping me from my quiet time with the Lord. But my priorities were more pressing. I knew I needed to rest in Him. I knew I needed to be renewed by the Word. I knew I needed shelter from my storm.
But I was too busy.
I was on my way to the gym one morning when I was stopped at a railroad crossing. Nothing out of the ordinary, I thought. This should only be about a three-minute delay in my work out. Tops.
The dread on my face as I watched the train’s wheels begin to slow down and finally come to a complete stop. You have got to be kidding me! Three minutes passed, then five, then ten. I looked around for a way of escape, but there was just no possible escape plan. There were cars beside me, cars behind me, and a stalled freight train in front of me.
It was now safe for me to panic.
I couldn’t just have ‘down’ time! I figured it would be so wise of me to be resourceful with my time and truthfully, I needed something to occupy my thoughts so that I didn’t scream. I looked around the car for paperwork to possibly sort through and there was my Bible, sitting there on the back seat, waving at me, and even calling my name. I’m pretty sure that was sleep deprivation talking.
I grabbed it, leafed through it, and began to read. And pray. And listen. And pray some more. Goodness, I needed this moment right here.
Come to Me, all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy and My burden is light. Matthew 11:28-30 (NASB)
Sigh.
Yes, I hear you, Lord.
The train finally began to move after 45 minutes of being stalled. It was the same amount of time I would have spent at the gym. Go figure. I couldn’t tell you exactly what happened to that train, but I know He knows. And I definitely learned my valuable lesson that morning.
There’s no benefit to me, us, in forsaking our quiet time with the One who restores. He provides rest for the weary, peace for the anxious, faith for those in doubt, wisdom for those with questions, confidence for those who are uncertain, and direction for those that are searching.
…like me.
Nicole 🙂
